For the first time in a LONG time I felt amazing inside to the point that I got chills all over my body. They were like waves of happiness. Even though it was just for a but, it made me so happy. I CAN be happy! It happened two times throughout the day. You know when people say it feels like Fall? Well I felt that. I felt a feeling I had in high school when I would go for walks at a park with my boyfriend in Fall/Winter. Just thinking about spending the holidays with my family actually makes me want to smile and not for pretend. Watching a YouTube video of a mother sharing her story of PPD made me realize that other women go through this and they are able to feel happy again and I just imagined my life in the future with my daughter, at that exact moment I thanked God so much for bringing me so far, for my family and friends who are always there for me. For some people it may seem like what? Why are you yapping so much about being happy for a couple of minutes? Well because when I see that I can be happy after being depressed and having horrible thoughts, I am slowly recovering.